you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
