We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
