she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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