And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
