This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
You've changed since you got that strap on
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
