i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
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