I'd wear matching sweaters with you
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
25 Things All Men Can Definitely Agree On
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.