this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
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