You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
