YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Randomize
