there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize