Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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