It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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