Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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