suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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