She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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