Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize