oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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