Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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