Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
