Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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