Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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