How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
