well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
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