my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
