"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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