I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
