Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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