So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I skipped work to stalk him.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
