I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
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I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
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A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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