Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
