You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Terrible idea I love it
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
