just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
