i just google imaged poop.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
