I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
It's blow job season.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
