He kissed a someone with a penis
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Randomize
