AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
