How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
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