I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
We need to get me chipped asap
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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