Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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