Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
