i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
