well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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