Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(847): View more from Illinois

I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting

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(847): I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting http://tfl.nu/4np3

Replies (1) Good night (1031) Bad night (592)
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(248): View more from Michigan

No idea how I passed that sobriety test.

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(248): No idea how I passed that sobriety test. http://tfl.nu/5pip

Replies (19) Good night (1872) Bad night (583)
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(443): View more from Maryland

So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.

(443): View more from Maryland

It breaks. We fall.

(443): View more from Maryland

I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?

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(443): So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in. (443): It breaks. We fall. (443): I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys? http://tfl.nu/201c

Replies (14) Good night (612) Bad night (3186)
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(805): View more from California

all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.

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(805): all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl. http://tfl.nu/c5of

Replies (14) Good night (1003) Bad night (4150)
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(414): View more from Wisconsin

You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.

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(414): You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning. http://tfl.nu/dt9p

Replies (9) Good night (5298) Bad night (656)
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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.

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(717): Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate. http://tfl.nu/t5hj

Replies (31) Good night (6186) Bad night (1713)
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(917): View more from New York City

someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.

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(917): someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week. http://tfl.nu/uy84

Replies (6) Good night (4086) Bad night (1126)
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(330): View more from Ohio

Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls

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(330): Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls http://tfl.nu/m4sw

Replies (22) Good night (923) Bad night (3967)
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(207): View more from Maine

I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.

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(207): I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots. http://tfl.nu/eygf

Replies (5) Good night (3547) Bad night (1223)
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(416): View more from Toronto

juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.

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(416): juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning. http://tfl.nu/mbo9

Replies (12) Good night (1755) Bad night (987)
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(214): View more from Texas

Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.

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(214): Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask. http://tfl.nu/3wq6

Replies (7) Good night (1628) Bad night (613)
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(720): View more from Colorado

The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?

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(720): The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer? http://tfl.nu/dm5m

Replies (8) Good night (624) Bad night (885)
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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.

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(570): You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it. http://tfl.nu/ka5y

Replies (1) Good night (428) Bad night (362)
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(805): View more from California

How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?

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(805): How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution? http://tfl.nu/e70o

Replies (5) Good night (551) Bad night (353)
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(315): View more from New York

I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex

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(315): I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex http://tfl.nu/6so3

Replies (1) Good night (237) Bad night (37)

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