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Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
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