i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
pray to the hookup gods
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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