I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
