it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
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