Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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