Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Do you still have your period?
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
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