i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
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