...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Randomize
