Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
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He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
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Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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